Bullying victims have doubts about their own worth and give the power to answer the question of their worth to the outside world. At the same time, there is a hunch that their worthlessness is wrong. This leads to a desperate conflict in the bullying victim, which in the worst case can lead to suicide.
The (bullying) perpetrator also has doubts about its value, but also gets the answer from outside (and therefore just as worthless). In contrast to the victim, however, this happens proactively through the humiliation of others. He intuitively recognizes the possible victims, since the two of them (victim and perpetrator) are connected by doubts about their value. In contrast to the victim, the perpetrator is not afraid to inflict suffering on others in order to remove his doubts. One is an active shadow and the other a passive one according to the “shadow principle” by Rüdiger Dahlke.
Bullying victims and perpetrators must take full responsibility for their worthlessness in order to get out of the bullying process. The realization that an external judgment determines your own original value is one of the first steps. Mike Helwig helped us along the way with radical permission and Safi Nidiaye and Ms. Gebauer with body-centered heart work. Here you can find more about our Inspirations.
Partners of bullying victims and perpetrators are also facing a major challenge. You are constantly asked to give the bully victim / perpetrator from outside. As a result, they cause more doubts about worthlessness and / or suffer from the pressure of the bully. Often, the partners can only escape the doubts about the values of the victims of the bullying.